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Hee hee, Bryce doesn't think this is as funny as I do :D

Jillian, I am still hideously sweaty, and I am not noticing any weight loss, or inches loss. I am not happy about that. I am happy about my idea to ignore you though. Working out is so much more pleasant when you are just a far away voice occasionally interrupting my thoughts. :P

Hi Jillian. I bet you think I fell off the bandwagon because I didn't workout for two days, and then I took a long time to post this. I bet there is even a twisted little part of you that hopes that I did give up, because then it would prove how tough you are and how comparatively weak I am. But you are going to be disappointed. Because I didn't fall off the bandwagon. When it comes to working out I decided this will be my motto now: “If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading a magazine.”-Jack Handy You are the cowboy Jillian. Being mean and making me do horrible things, hoping to finally punish me to the point where I will cut the rope and escape. (Especially because I don't think I am losing any weight or getting more toned, even though I am being careful about what I eat!) But I am going to stick with it, not because I believe it is going to work, but out of pure...

Hi Jillian. Yesterday my brother-in-law got married so I didn't workout. Today is a holiday. I don't have to workout on holidays. I am playing with these guys: 'K bye!

Sunday is a day of rest, and no part of my Sunday was as restful as the 27 minutes when I was not listening to Jillian. This turned out to be problematic because allowing me to distance myself from Jillian renewed and even increased my contempt for her. I think I may be moving toward full blown loathing now. This made it very difficult to turn on the DVD. I did it though. Jillian said that by days 5-7 I should be noticing a huge improvement in stamina. I hate to admit it, (you know, because of the loathing,) but she was right. The workout seemed a lot easier than it did in the beginning. I am also much less sweaty. Still sweaty enough to have it get in my eyes though, bleah. This has led me to discover one of Jillian's secret powers: The amazingly large eyebrows are not just to make her look like a menacing villain! They are functional! When sweat gets in my eyes I imagine it is Jillian spitting on me in disgust.

Today was a little bit better maybe. I don't really trust my own estimations though, because I am starting to suspect that this DVD is designed to cause you to fall victim to Stockholm Syndrome. That article says there are three main components in developing Stockholm Syndrome: A severely uneven power relationship in which the captor dictates what the prisoner can and cannot do The threat of death or physical injury to the prisoner at the hands of the captor A self-preservation instinct on the part of the prisoner First of all Jillian is in a position of total power. When she says "Jump" you literally jump, and she says "jump" a lot. She is also inflicting pain on you through the tasks you must preform, but there is always the promise that if you can perform the tasks as well as Natalie and Anita you won't feel the need to cheat, and it won't be hard for you anymore. Basically if you can learn to please Jillian, your pain will be taken away from you. She...

I have decided that Jillian doesn't have a script writer, or she does have one who is just really bad. She has this surprise rant during the workout: "So often, people think that they're not strong enough; you guys are always told, 'just take the stairs', that is a false message of lethargy that is not doing you any favors.You are capable of working out." This is the third time I have heard it and I still cannot be sure what she is trying to say. Taking the stairs is lethargic? Taking the stairs is not a workout? I am not strong enough for the elevator so I should take the stairs instead? What does it mean? Here's the thing though Jillian, it doesn't matter what you mean, because of this workout my legs are so sore and tired that they are like two huge bags of pudding I have to haul around all day. I can't take the stairs. The best I can do is drag myself to an elevator and hope someone kicks me in and out of it.